Updated: Nov 19
November is a month that always reminds me of the word gratitude. I have found that it is in gratitude we can truly appreciate and find love in our lives. Gratitude is the gateway to love. It is in gratitude that we begin to see the world through the lens of our Creator's goodness. It is in the revelation of his goodness that we can clearly see and feel love. While today I may not have all that I want, I am grateful for all that I do have. I am filled with gratitude for the ability to smile. I am thankful for my ability to move. I am thankful for my possessions, and I am thankful that every day I can share peace, joy, and laughter with others.
This morning I woke up from a vivid dream that I feel further illustrates the power of seeking God through gratitude. The dream began with me looking in the mirror. What looked like little hard flecks near my eyes were covering the perimeter. I tried to wipe them away, but they seemed to be stuck. I took my fingernails, and I began to scrape the top of my skin near my eyes. I realized as I did this that the flecks were the heads of worms. As a side note- I know this is gross, and I apologize. Anyways, the worms were stuck near and around my eyes. I began to dig a little deeper into my skin as I began to force out these bugs. The bugs started to come up a little more, so I began to pull them out. One by one I pulled out the worms. They were squirming on the table and so I started to squish them. I was relieved and filled with gratitude as each left my skin and perished on the table. As I began to awaken from the dream, I heard clear as day, the bible verse from Matthew 7:7. I heard, “Ask, and it will be given to you, seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” A feeling of gratitude overwhelmed me that morning.
You are probably scratching your head as to why I would be grateful. After all, I had this gross dream that I was pulling worms out of the skin near my eyeballs and squishing them on the table. The reason I was filled with gratitude is that for the past decade I have been crying out to the Lord to purge every lie ever spoken about me, to me, and at me that has blurred my vision of my identity. I have cried out to the Lord to show me the true colors of the people around me. I have cried out to the Lord to purge every unsavory thing about me that keeps me away from aligning with his spirit. I have cried out to the Lord to show me where I have fallen short so that I can be a beautiful tapestry of his love for those around me. I have asked him to show me through clear vision who I am in him regardless of the torments and abuse I have experienced.
The revelation that I had is that the Lord was sharing with me so long as I ask, seek, and knock for answers the Truth will be revealed in its own time. He has proven this in my life, especially over the past year. It has been a dry dark desert for a long time in my personal life. I have lost much, but in the end, I know I have gained so much more in him. My gratitude is in his undying loyalty and love for me. In my own effort, I could never do this. Yet, in the consistent seeking of the heavenly father, he plucks the parasites that have blurred my vision. He clears the air and unveils those who are for and who are against. He shows where I have fallen short and where I have succeeded. It is through gratitude for him and praising him before the breakthroughs that his love sustains. It is in asking, seeking, and knocking consistently that has opened my vision to the truths that I so desperately needed answers to in my life. It is not so much that I receive all the answers, but instead receive the peace of his presence in the “waiting room” that we call life.
It is in the asking, seeking, and knocking that we find on the other side our savior ready and willing to tend to our wounds and our hearts. He is unbothered by the worms that cover our vision from seeing clearly. When we seek, ask, and knock for him to come he will unabashedly come to us and wipe our faces. He will be our clear vision; he will bless our lips with words of gratitude and praise. His hand will rest upon your shoulder anointed in his holiness; your brow will drip with the fresh oil of heaven. You will walk in the sweet kingly fragrance of our Lord, and he will pour out his goodness upon you. The death and destruction of the enemy will never overcome the overwhelming grace of our father. If you too are in a season of readiness for fresh vision. Come all who are weary. He wishes to share with you all that you asked for, sought out, and knocked at the door for in your life. He has a chair for you at his table. Do not worry in fear of his judgment. We all have worms that need to be plucked out. Let him love you through to the other side. He will love you greater than you could ever fathom.